


Memories That Haunt Me

by PONKAN



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Best Friends, Best Friends Choi Soobin & Choi Yeonjun, Broken Friendship, Choi Yeonjun-Centric, Confused Choi Yeonjun, Drama, Established Relationship, Heartache, M/M, Minor Choi Beomgyu/Choi Yeonjun, Misunderstandings, Old Friends, One Shot, Oneshot, Scary, Yeonbin, Yeonbin Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:34:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25330957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PONKAN/pseuds/PONKAN
Summary: Yeonjun gets separated from his friend inside the haunted school building he's forced to visit. He tries to catch up but sees his old friend, Soobin, instead. Together, they reminisce and try to figure out what broke their friendship.
Relationships: Choi Soobin/Choi Yeonjun
Comments: 14
Kudos: 50





	Memories That Haunt Me

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote another au! I enjoyed writing this one as well, so I hope you enjoy reading it!
> 
> I'm also not sure how the readers would react to this one. I'm really curious so please let me know how you thought of it.  
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> The events in this story are purely fictitious and not related to the real idols in any way. It is only written for entertainment.

“Ugh, I hate you guys,” Yeonjun whined as he stood before the old school building.

Yeonjun’s friends had been bugging him for a week to join them in their “test of courage” but he kept refusing their invitation. He thought they gave up when they asked to play night basketball, instead. Little did he know, it was just a way to get him out of his house at night. Yeonjun was naive enough to not notice this plan of theirs, and even sneaked in the school grounds of his middle school when he heard that his friend, Kai, went on the test of courage on his own and “injured” himself in the process.

“I love you, Yeonjun!” Kai winked at him and brushed the dirt off his pants.

“We didn’t know any other way to get you to join us,” his friend Beomgyu said. “Sorry Yeonjun.”

Yeonjun rolled his eyes and shook his head. He always did that when he felt upset.

Yeonjun has always hated spooky things since he was young. He hated ghosts, creepy dolls, haunted houses, and anything that could be described as eerie. Yet there he was, standing in front of the old school building, which he used to go to in middle school, now closed down and rumored to be haunted. 

Rumor has it that humming sounds could be heard in the quiet night when you pass by, and that a ghost could be seen sitting on one of the windows on the fourth floor. They said it was a student who had an accident and died there. Taehyun, another of Yeonjun’s friends and mastermind of the genius plan, had a sister who heard and saw the ghost with her own eyes when she went on a night date with her boyfriend. When Taehyun heard this from his sister, it sparked his interest so he invited his friends to visit with him. Unlike Yeonjun, Taehyun loved spooky things, and how unlucky for Yeonjun, because once Taehyun wants something, he gets it.

“This is gonna be fun!” Taehyun exclaimed with excitement. He grinned and was filled with glee.

“It’s just a rumor! You won’t find anything in there!” Yeonjun was worked up.

The middle school closed down right after Yeonjun graduated and started attending high school. Although only three years have passed since then, the school building looked like it was abandoned for a decade. The walls had visible cracks, some windows were shattered, and dried leaves scattered outside the building. It looked like a nightmare, even Yeonjun couldn’t recognize it. It was perfectly suited to be a home for a ghost.

“Let’s pair up. Kai comes with me. Beomgyu, you go with Yeonjun.”

“And we’ll decide who goes first with rock, paper, scissors.”

Yeonjun was not liking this idea at all. He kept whining all throughout their game of rock, paper, scissors, and wished they wouldn't go first. Congratulations to him, he and Beomgyu would go after Taehyun and Kai. He let out a sigh of relief, as if he escaped the “test of courage” which he did not. 

“Good luck and come out soon, please.” Beomgyu waved his friends goodbye. 

Taehyun and Kai linked arms as they entered the main entrance, leaving Yeonjun and Beomgyu sitting on the damaged bench outside. Every few minutes or so, they could hear short screams echoing from inside the building, which they recognized as Kai’s. And everytime he screamed, Yeonjun jumped in his seat and screamed back in irritation. Sometimes, he would stand and kick the dirt to express his frustration and hide his anxiety. 

After the screams stopped, Yeonjun felt restless. He aggressively chewed his lips and his leg shook rapidly while his head was down, facing the ground. Beomgyu put his hand on Yeonjun’s leg to stop it and looked at him worriedly. “I shouldn’t have listened to Taehyun,” he thought while he moved closer and let their shoulders touch.

It took a little over twenty minutes until Taehyun and Kai came out of the building. “They’re out!” Beomgyu yelled and Yeonjun was at ease when he saw his two friends walking towards them. Yeonjun scanned the two from head to toe and saw that they were fine although looking very tired. “How was it?” Beomgyu asked them. Taehyun let out a deep sigh and Kai scratched his head. 

“There wasn’t anything on the fourth floor. Did they get the floor level right?” Taehyun said. He glanced at Kai then proceeded to put his palm on his own face. “He kept screaming at everything. I told him to shut up when I reached my limit.”

“Sorry,” Kai said while laughing loudly. His laughter rang in their ears and woke Yeonjun’s senses.

Yeonjun was glad his friends came back alright but their lack of fear disturbed him. He couldn’t fathom how they still looked calm even after spending twenty minutes in that freaky place. He felt chills in his spine when he imagined it and remembered that he was about to go next. His heart raced, his breathing got louder, and his face formed a panicked look. 

Beomgyu took his hand and tried to comfort him. Slowly, they walked towards the main entrance of the building, which was slightly open. Yeonjun couldn’t think clearly and was regretting the decisions he made during his eighteen years of life until he heard his name being called.

“Yeonjun!” Kai shouted from the bench. “If you don’t come out, don’t worry! I’ll continue my life as Choi Yeonjun just for you!” 

“Shut up, Kai!” Yeonjun now felt his anger overpowering his fear. Taehyun’s and Kai’s loud giggles could be heard even from far away. Yeonjun swore to come out safe and sound then give those two devils what they deserved.

Inside the building, it was pitch black and they could only see things when Beomgyu’s flashlight shone over them. He walked in front of Yeonjun and led him to the staircase. Still holding hands, they walked silently and carefully, making sure to not step on anything strange. Both of their hearts raced but the reasons for their loudly beating hearts were different. The reason for Yeonjun was fear, while for Beomgyu, it’s because of their intertwined fingers. He too was afraid but the thought of having Yeonjun near comforted him.

Yeonjun let go of Beomgyu's hand only when they arrived at the foot of the staircase but still kept himself close. Right before they climbed up, he noticed his untied shoelaces. He crouched down and asked Beomgyu to wait for him before continuing on to the second floor. After he tied it properly, he stood up and froze. He was alone. 

Beomgyu didn’t hear him and unknowingly left him. Yeonjun felt cold and he wasn’t thinking clearly. He just stood there, not knowing what to do. After a minute or two of paralysis, he rushed to climb up the stairs, thinking Beomgyu must’ve gone straight to the fourth floor. He passed by the second floor quickly and when he reached the third floor, he paused to catch his breath. He was too anxious and couldn’t breathe properly. He placed his hand on the wall, looked around to see if he had caught up with Beomgyu. The lighting there was good since the moonlight entered through the glass windows and illuminated the hallway. Yeonjun saw someone standing not too far from him, so he walked over and called Beomgyu’s name.

“Beomgyu, I told you to wait for-”

His jaw dropped. Looking at him wasn’t Beomgyu but his old friend, Soobin, who continued to stare at him before saying, “Yeonjun? What are you doing here? I thought you hated haunted places.”

Soobin met Yeonjun in middle school and became best friends. They spent happy days together in that very same building when it was still taken care of. They were inseparable in middle school and went on to attend the same high school. That’s when they were in different classes and when things started to go downhill. Unfortunately, their friendship couldn’t be saved but they still cared for each other at the bottom of their hearts.

“What are _you_ doing here?” Yeonjun reflected the question back to Soobin.

“I visit sometimes,” Soobin replied calmly. “To relive my memories.”

Yeonjun didn’t know what to feel when he saw Soobin. He was still shaking and felt chills in his spine whenever he heard him speak, but he loosened up and his fear went away when he saw his smile. How he missed seeing that beautiful smile and those dimples that appeared whenever he did. He went to approach him slowly as Soobin sat on the window, facing outside and swayed his legs back and forth - a thing he always did and got in trouble for a few years back. It was silent for a few seconds until Soobin chuckled and said, “Remember when I got yelled at for sitting here?”

“Yeah, teachers always told you it was dangerous and that you might fall,” Yeonjun reminisced.

“I know it was dangerous. I told them that but they kept nagging me.”

“Then why do you still sit here?”

“Because it _is_ dangerous.”

“You’re not making any sense.”

“I never told you but sitting here… makes me feel powerful. I feel fearless and think that I could take on the world. Once I get off, I go back to being the timid person I was.”

Yeonjun never knew he felt that way. He knew Soobin was shy but didn’t know about his insecurities. He again felt a failure of a friend to Soobin. He first felt this when he noticed Soobin being sad during their first year of high school but never asked him about it. 

He thought maybe it wasn’t too late to ask. 

Just as he opened his mouth to speak, he heard Soobin humming a nostalgic song. Yeonjun’s memories of being a middle schooler were brought back upon hearing this tune. They used to sing this song together. He remembered the happy days they spent running in the hallways, laughing loudly on their desks, and competing to buy the best bread in the cafeteria. For a second, the hallway looked bright like it did when it was full of lively students. Yeonjun glanced at Soobin and felt sadness. He asked without hesitation, “What happened to us, Soobin?”

“Things happened,” Soobin said calmly, as if it was nothing, still looking at a distance and not at Yeonjun.

“What do you mean? What ‘things?’ What happened? One day we’re best friends then suddenly there was a wall between us.”

“We drifted apart. Just like you said, one day we’re best friends then suddenly there was a wall between us.”

Yeonjun wasn’t happy with his answer and Soobin looked like he wasn’t either. There was misery in the air and both of them looked like they wanted to cry. The feeling was heavy and unpleasant memories played in Yeonjun’s head. He couldn’t say his high school life so far was awful because it wasn’t, he was enjoying high school with his other friends. But he figured it was for Soobin, not having his best friend there for him.

After their friendship naturally broke off, Yeonjun never forgot Soobin and watched him from afar. He looked at him whenever he passed by his classroom. He looked for him in the crowd when he played basketball. He happily looked for his name whenever they announced the top scorers every exam season. He still watched over him like a friend would have done but he distanced himself from him. That night was the first time he talked to him again in a long time.

“Was it because I had my own friends?” Yeonjun asked softly. Soobin shrugged and thought for a moment.

“You having your own friends wasn’t a problem, don’t worry,” Soobin looked at Yeonjun and reassured him. “I think the problem was with me.”

Yeonjun was puzzled by his answer. He didn’t speak to let Soobin continue and stared at him. It’s been years since he saw his face this clearly, and nothing about Soobin seemed to have changed, apart from getting taller and surpassing his height by a few centimeters. He still had the same fluffy hair, the same soft cheeks, the same eyes that smiled along with his lips, and those dimples. He loved touching those dimples. Then after touching them, he would pull his cheeks and Soobin never complained. He only did whenever he attempted to kiss him.

“I was too ahead of myself and started to think things that weren’t true so I got disappointed by nothing,” Soobin continued, feeling embarrassed. “That was kinda stupid.”

“What are you talking about?” Yeonjun still couldn’t understand what he was saying. His face showed his confusion especially when he saw Soobin looking flustered.

“I thought- I thought we were special. Then one day, you started talking about this guy and called him cute and you were so excited.”

“We _were_ special, Soobin. I still don’t get what you mean. I thought it wasn’t because of my friends?”

“You really don’t get it Yeonjun,” Soobin was frustrated. He furrowed his eyebrows and looked at Yeonjun with a frown on his face.

Yeonjun rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Why does he have to be so cryptic?” he thought.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me. You always did that when you felt upset.” Soobin grumbled. He lifted his leg and shifted his sitting position. With one foot on the floor, while the other was still hanging outside, he could talk to Yeonjun face-to-face. 

“Then tell me the real reason!”

“I just did!” Soobin cried. “I thought we were special! I thought we liked each other and that was stupid of me. I couldn’t face you properly because it was so embarrassing. Our friendship changed. Then one day I realized, we stopped talking and I could only see you in the hallways. I wanted to talk to you but you looked so happy with your new friends and thought maybe you forgot about me.”

Soobin’s eyes looked around the whole time and couldn’t bear to look at Yeonjun. Not when he just confessed to him after years of having a crush on him. He didn’t hear a reply so he took a glance and saw Yeonjun shedding tears. 

“Thank God,” Yeonjun said, feeling relieved and smiled. Tears continued to stream down his face. “I thought you hated me all this time.”

Soobin chuckled at his remark, not noticing tears also started flowing from his eyes. “I could never hate you, Yeonjun.”

Oceans of tears continued to flow down, carrying all the painful memories they had the past few years without each other. Those same tears glistened as the moonlight shone on their faces, making it clear for the other person to see. They both felt like something had been lifted off their chests, something heavy, something painful. But truthfully speaking, that weight wasn’t heavy at all, and only they made it feel heavy. For years, they blinded themselves with an illusion, something they made up.

“But I told you, we were special. I’ve loved you since middle school. Even after we stopped talking, I missed you. I still miss you sometimes,” Yeonjun confessed.

Soobin couldn’t believe what he just heard. Memories of them flashed before his eyes. He remembered the things Yeonjun said and the things he did. Touching his dimples, squishing his cheeks, and the attempted kisses. They were signs. They were definitely signs. All this time, he was right, but he misunderstood. Then he remembered something. “But what about the guy you called cute?”

“I don’t even know who you’re talking about. I call everyone cute.”

“But you looked so excited and-”

“Did you really like me, Soobin? How could you not notice me looking only at you? And thinking that I liked someone else but you? I’m kinda disappointed.” Yeonjun pouted and crossed his arms. He then proceeded to roll his eyes and shake his head.

“Well, sorry ‘bout that.” Soobin grumbled with a sarcastic tone.

They stared at each other’s faces, without saying a single word. But they didn’t feel it was silent. It’s like they communicated with their minds and were having a meaningful conversation. Then they laughed. They laughed their hearts out like they were crazy. They laughed at their bickering, their stupidity, their love, and at the chances they’ve lost. Soft laughter filled the air as they continued. Were they laughing because they felt amused, or because they were hiding the pain they felt in their hearts?

“It hurts,” Yeonjun said after he stopped laughing. “It hurts, Soobin.” On his face was the smile he always wore but it looked so sorrowful and filled with regret. Then tears streamed down his face again. 

“I know it does,” Soobin felt the same way. His heart also ached, especially at the sight of Yeonjun crying before him. “But you know for yourself that you have to forget about me.”

“I can’t, Soobin. I can’t forget you. That’s the one thing I could never do in my life.”

“But you know you have to.”

“I can’t accept that!”

Soobin couldn’t reply to him anymore and kept silent. He let out a heavy sigh and forced a smile, his dimples appearing beside the corner of his lips. Yeonjun walked closer to him, lifted a hand and tried to reach for his face and hold it gently but stopped midway. He wanted to give him a kiss, for real this time, but thought that it would hurt him more.

“Yeonjun! Where are you?!”

“Yeonjun, don’t worry, we’ll be there!” 

“We’ll come get you!”

Yeonjun was so busy talking to Soobin and forgot about the test of courage. He figured he took too long that his friends already got worried and desperate to find him. He didn’t answer and just looked at Soobin, who put both feet on the floor and stood up. 

“They’re looking for you,” Soobin said, dusting off his clothes. He was wearing his school uniform that suited him so much. It was his best look, just like Yeonjun said.

“That’s my signal,” Yeonjun said as he put his hand down to his side. “I have to go now.”

“Well, then. I can finally leave now too.” Soobin said softly, with a lonely smile on his face. He wanted to hug Yeonjun but couldn’t bear to do it, so he clenched his fists. “Before I say goodbye, I wanted to apologize… for avoiding you after that day. It’s my fault all this happened.”

“No, _I’m sorry._ I’m sorry for not being there for you. Even when you had an accident-”

“Where are you, Yeonjun?!” His friends’ screams echoed through the abandoned building once again. 

“You really have to go now,” Soobin told him. “They’re worried. Goodbye, Yeonjun.”

Yeonjun shook his head slowly, bit his lip, and looked at the floor before looking up at Soobin again. His eyes were screaming sadness and his brows furrowed. He took a few light steps backwards then walked to the staircase, never looking away from Soobin. Soobin stood there and waited for Yeonjun to leave, with one hand in his pocket, and waving the other. 

“Goodbye, Soobin.”

Yeonjun went down the stairs with a heavy heart and right when he stepped on the second floor, a light shone on his face. He closed his eyes for a second because the light was blinding, then he felt someone hug him. It became noisy and his friends were crowding him, looking so relieved.

“I’m so sorry, Yeonjun!” Beomgyu cried out as he held Yeonjun tightly. “I should’ve noticed you were gone a lot earlier. You must’ve been so scared.”

“We were so worried!” Kai exclaimed.

“Where were you?” Taehyun asked.

Yeonjun gave them a smile as an answer and patted Beomgyu’s head. “Let’s go home.”

They left the school grounds with mixed feelings. The atmosphere was weird and none of them spoke, until Taehyun said, “Beomgyu, you should take Yeonjun home.” 

“I will,” Beomgyu replied with a flushed face. Taehyun winked at him before leaving with Kai.

On the way home, Yeonjun was deep in thought. He was silent just like the night was. Beomgyu tried to talk to him but only received short and dry replies, so he just kept quiet too. They could only hear their footsteps on the cement sidewalk and the sound of the light wind blowing through the trees. They continued on like this until they realized they already arrived at Yeonjun’s home.

“Thanks, Gyu,” Yeonjun said, looking at the ground. As he was about to pass through the small front gate, he heard his name. Only then did he look back to see Beomgyu’s face. Beomgyu approached him and embraced him tightly without saying a word. Confused as he was, he hugged him back and thanked him again before leaving him outside his house.

Beomgyu stayed a while to watch Yeonjun’s back going slowly away from him. When he was about to leave, he heard a sound coming from his phone. It was a message from Taehyun. “It was the third floor?” Beomgyu thought out loud as he read the text.

Yeonjun felt exhausted. He just dragged his body to his room and immediately fell to the floor when he got there. He bent his knees and placed his elbows on them as his hands ran through his hair. He let out a heavy sigh and looked around his room. Something caught his eye and he slowly stood up to approach it. 

On his table was a picture frame facing down, like it fell on its own. He took it in his hands and looked at the photo placed inside. It was an old photo from his middle school days, and posing beside him was Soobin, who was shorter then.

Yeonjun chuckled softly as he continued to stare at the photo. He felt like crying again but he already let out all his tears earlier. With dry eyes and his hand still holding the picture frame, he sat on the floor beside his bed. He smiled and spoke.

“I can move on but I really can’t forget you. I’m glad we got to talk, Soobin. **Although I wish it happened before you died last year.** ”


End file.
